Note to Self: The danger isn't the market; the danger is complaining.
Two years ago we complained the economy shut down. Then we complained the market rebounded, but inventory was scarce. In January we complained strong demand drove multiple bids. Then we complained affordability fell. We moaned buyers could hardly preview homes. Then we complained they stopped applying for loans.
So, strong or weak, busy or slow, rising or falling, rising sales times or nothing to show, the one thing you can always find in the marketplace is -
Someone complained.
Recently a broker friend called me.
"I am worried about the signals we're getting," she said.
"Getting, or sending?" I asked.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, you receive data and then you react. Your opinion isn’t just intellectual: it’s influenced by how you reacted. Meanwhile, your actions send plenty of signals, while your mind is still forming an explanation.”
“So our mindset often comes after our behaviors,” she said.
“Which means you should ask: How do your people typically react when they learn about change? Because the market changes every day.”
How we think doesn't always come first. During rapid change, we act and react, then explain things to ourselves later. If our default behavior is fear and scarcity - we complain, criticize and commiserate about everything. Then we transmit that fear to others. A vicious cycle.
The solution, however, is to learn that pessimism isn’t the source of bad behavior.
It is the dangerous result of it.
A week later I checked in with my friend. She had been practicing techniques to change her team’s instant reactions her to daily data. “Each morning we start by finding one good thing that happened in the last 24 hours. Then we read a headline and reframe it from a negative to a positive. Even if we can’t make it perfect, we find better words to describe it - and we see something good we can do because of it,” she reported.
“What about your customers?” I asked.
“We practice presentations that start by identifying the opportunities and benefits of changes in the market. We stopped pointing to fears of missing out,” she said. “Clients feel much more encouraged after leaving our office than when they came in.”
And the complaining?
“We are more aware when we’re commiserating in our conversations. Now we call each other out and nudge our discussions away from criticism first.”
“Ironically, we laugh a lot more these days,” she said. “It’s almost like we’ve given ourselves permission not to be gloomy, and our natural optimism has blossomed.”
Sometimes we can think ourselves into a funk.
Other times, it starts with bad behavior.
Our thumbs and tongues are tempted to find the bad,
And our minds quickly catch up and tell us we’re sad.
Give thanks, catch yourself, change the words you use,
And before long you’ll realize no matter what -
YOU can’t lose!