For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. - Sir Isaac Newton
During a crisis, it’s understandable to feel confused - like everything is upside down and chaos surrounds us. But what’s the explanation for whirlwind during normal times?
Twenty years ago my company handled thousands of support calls daily for the largest real estate firms and associations in America. With a couple dozen people running multiple shifts solving a non-stop flow of tech problems that evolved daily, it was definitely hectic - but also fun. We did great work, answering most calls under a minute and resolving most problems on the first try.
In normal times.
One day I noticed the morning team’s performance was periodically lower than the evening team. I thought, “Same training, same products, same tools. Why would their performance be lower, as a group?” So I asked my COO.
“Do they need more training?”
“Nope,” she said.
“More supervision, then?“
“Not the problem,” she deadpanned.
“Better communication skills?”
“Naaah.”
“Well?!” I threw my hands up.
“Look at the pattern,” she pointed to the report. “The problem isn’t lack of knowledge or skill or commitment,” she said calmly.
“The problem is YOU!”
I sat back in my chair. “On the days you’re not on the road, you show up early. You race through traffic, drinking twenty ounces of coffee, listening to talk radio, dealing with bad weather and inevitably upset someone is in your parking spot. You fly up the stairs and explode into the office shouting for your assistant and mumbling under your breath. You’re like a whirlwind of chaos...”
“... right in front of the morning team.”
No wonder they were having difficulty. Like a human hurricane, I brought chaos to their timeline every time I showed up. I was loud and opinionated and frustrated at everything. I thought only of myself: my coffee was cold, traffic was thwarting me and people on the radio were stupid. When I arrived at the office, I was so wrapped up in me, the first thing I did was fight back - at the wrong people.
Yet as Newton’s Law says, for every action, I put out an equal and opposite force pushed back. My people’s production fell and they started to disconnect from someone who was supposed to charge them up:
Me.
I learned a hard lesson that day: If things seem to be going poorly around you, take a good look in the mirror. It started me down a long and challenging journey towards understanding the role I play in crafting the kind of world I want to live in. Within twenty feet of my morning routine, my ripple effects could energize or demoralize others.
Now think of what I could do on stage, in video and through social media. When I wonder when things will get better, I ask myself what I’m adding to the situation.
If I’m frustrated with what I see on TV, on social, in the neighborhood, I reflect on what I’m adding.
When I catch myself waiting for someone else to do something, anything to make everything calm and good and polite, I’ve learned to take a long look in the mirror.
Back then, I created a new habit. Every morning before entering the building I stopped and took a long breath. I imagined that the door handle was like a lightning rod: When I grabbed it, it would drain away all the hot sparks of the coffee, traffic, radio and weather. It would reset my energy. And I would then be ready to enter the building in the right manner.
To be the person my people needed me to be:
The start of a good day.
The sign of a sound mind.
The sail to take them
to the right place.
Today that lightning rod has become my hashtag #AlwaysInspiring. If I can’t attach it to something I’m about to do - a call, a class, a conversation - it stops me from adding fuel to the fire. It keeps me from being a source of trouble - skipping the comments and leaving danger zones like Twitter. It redirects my energies into recharging the potential of those with whom I connect.
If you’re wondering how “things” will get better,
If you’ve ever thought everyone else was the problem,
If you think the answer is a quick zap or jolt or quip,
If you think the world is happening to you, rather than with you,
Maybe it’s time for you, too,
to transform the shock of your
energy into the fuel for time well spent.
Maybe it’s time to give the world the gift,
Of a little less chaos, a little more politeness,
To make friends, not waves, and smiles, not likes.
With every call or email or post or tweet instead
Share the joy of being connected to -
A Better Me.
A better you.