During difficult times it’s hard to recognize even the little things that might be okay. Certainly, we must pay attention to difficulty, but we don’t have to let it dominate our every thought. We’ve learned this from history, from crises we’ve overcome in the world and in our individual lives. Yet we often forget what our best tool was during those moments:
Our mindset.
At the beginning of the pandemic, stock market regulators triggered a temporary pause to trading. Essentially they flipped a circuit breaker on the computers they were automatically executing trades based on an algorithm - one that was designed to account for “normal” conditions. The trouble with programs though is that they only know what to do when things are normal. They aren’t too good at improvising or handling the unexpected. So when we put things on automatic they usually do fine on a sunny day. But if clouds appear on the horizon, they often don’t know what to do. Or they make things worse.
So from time to time you have to hit the circuit breaker.
The same is true for our minds. Thankfully we live in an age of abundance and goodness where most of us can go along in automatic mode most days without much worry. Our mind becomes attuned to a positive normal and we think thoughts that match.
Alas, automatic mode works both ways. when something goes wrong we go into an automatic mode - one that was programmed into us millions of years ago - of flight or flight or freeze. It happens so fast we hardly realize it. And while this mindset was originally designed to keep us safe and strong, in the modern world it often works contrary to the actions we need to take in order to overcome a challenge.
So we need to flip the switch.
One technique I learned to do this from my mentor was something I learned as a Rotarian called “One Good Thing.” At the start of our meetings we each call out one good thing that has happened to us in the last week. It can be simple - a good conversation, a sale made, a project completed, a good grade at school - just something that added to your well being and sense of good. The key is in the recalling: the recognition that we often don’t notice what’s fine when our program is stuck looking for what’s wrong.
You can do this right now. Stop someone and ask them, “Hey, what’s something good that’s happened to you this week?” You can do it at the breakfast table or your office meeting table or on your social media page. And you can simply do it when you look yourself in the eye in the mirror today:
Hey! What’s something good that happened to me today?
Say it out loud.
Say it twice or thrice.
Say it with a smile.
And ask the next person you see, too!
Even write it in the comments below.
And then let the new program run its new course And - like its always done - even the toughest times starts to get a little better too.