Life isn’t one big Argument
Recently a speaking professional asked a question in a networking group: “Which mask do think is most comfortable to wear on stage?”
In the old days, if they’d asked “Which shirts or shoes are the best for a big speech?” I’m sure people would have advocated for their favorite clothing and moved on. On this question, however, you’d have thought there was a call to arms.
“I’d decline the event!” said some.
Others argued medicine or policies.
Some found a personal affront in the idea of speaking with a mask.
For what it’s worth, I recommended my comfy Tom Ford mask and moved on.
Then I thought, what has become of our better angels?
Since when did everything become a prelude to an argument? Every post or conversation starter perceived as a correctness trap?
It doesn’t seem healthy to comment on everything and everyone. It must drive our adrenaline crazy. When I started seeing comments on advertisements - critiques from people who haven’t bought the product, I wondered “Who has the time?”
The impulse to correct everything and everyone simply isn’t normal.
In the old Monty Python skit, someone asks, “Is this the right room for an argument,” to which they get, “I’ve told you once already,” and a “no-you-didn’t-yes-I-did” hilarity ensues. If only such light-hearted fun were unfolding on the ‘nets these days. Somehow, the assumptions have shifted: Every post now risks being interpreted as an insult, every author a challenge, every meme a call to defend, every conversation a win-lose proposition with complete strangers - even a few friends.
Somehow we’ve lost the thread.
Take a deep breath.
Remind yourself why you’re here.
The world isn’t out to get you.
Being right isn’t the same as being righteous.
It’s okay if someone doesn’t know you’re smarter than them. Especially if, from time to time, you’re might not be.
“I’m not allowed to argue unless you pay,” finishes the old skit. “If I didn’t pay, then why are you arguing?” is the response. “I could be arguing in my spare time,” is the punchline.
If that’s how you’re going to use your spare time, let’s at least keep it a comedy, not a tragedy.